To cry or not to cry

This week has been a time of sadness. It's been a time of reflection and reminiscing. It has also been a time for tears. I've cried for a couple I know who are struggling in their marriage; for the pain I've experienced from a broken relationship and the hurt I've experienced from pain in my body. It's been hard, but I would much rather feel the pain than not feel anything at all. For some, crying comes rather easily; for others, shedding tears is perceived as a sign of weakness. I used to fall into the latter category and still find myself tempted from time to time to suppress any tears that might come. After my mom and dad divorced, 9 years ago, I pretty much shut down emotionally and had no desire to show the fact that I was falling apart on the inside. Not crying became a defense mechanism of sorts and even those rare moments where I would have liked to have cried; the tears just would not come, no matter what. I'm learning more and more the healing that can take place when I am willing to let the tears come. This year has been a hard one for several reasons. I experienced work stress, academic challenges, the loss of a friendship, and I also, for a time lost any sense of motivation or drive. Lots of tears were shed and more tears have been shed during the course of this week. I am learning how to express myself and how I'm feeling about things in a more healthy way than how I used to cope with stress and loss. I am learning that as painful as it can be, letting go of the tears bottled up inside is a much better alternative to ignoring the pain and suppressing it until I become a bit calloused. Instead of trying to be self-sufficient and believing the lie that says, "I don't need anyone."; I am learning how to cry out to Jesus in all circumstances and allowing Him to bring comfort and healing to me in a way that only He is capable. I am also learning that sometimes I need to talk to a good friend about what's going on in my life and be willing to be vulnerable.
Why do I write this, you may be wondering? For one, it's a good outlet for me to be able to write after a time of process and reflection. I also wanted to share in the hopes that my words might in some way encourage someone else and maybe inspire a little bit of courage for those of you who have a hard time admitting when life hurts. I am encouraged by the fact that even Jesus wept (John 11:35). Christ doesn't expect us to go through life with all its ups and downs stoically and act as if life doesn't hurt when it does. That's not a license for self-pity, bitterness and the like but He desires for us to be real and that involves admitting that life can hurt and that it's OK to show emotion and be vulnerable. The best thing we can do when life throws a curve ball is to run to Jesus! His Word offers comfort and hope in our time of need and it also offers admonishment and exhortation when we need that also. In Matthew, Jesus encourages us to come to him and find rest for his burden is light. In Isaiah, we are reminded that God is the Everlasting God and that he doesn't grow weary. If we hope in him, we will soar eagles and we will walk, but not faint. (paraphrase mine)
If you are hurting (or know someone who is) remind yourself (and them) that Jesus is ever present and that we can cry out to Him and He will give us rest. Be a friend to someone that you know who is struggling; drop them a note, give a hug, pay a visit; etc. And don't be afraid to cry- remember, even Jesus cried!